Oh Well! To all you poor fuckers who spent all that time on wondering what the fuck was going on in the TV show “Lost”. Sucked In! The writers have played a huge practical joke on you. The game was to see how much of your time they could waste.
I am glad to say that very early on I decided not to spend a minute trying to figure out what was happening. I correctly deduced that it would be a complete waste of time. I was right! I did watch it. I will admit that. It was somewhat entertaining, although most of the time I was drunk. I don’t mind getting drunk and watching mildly entertaining shows to relax and turn the old brain off in order to recharge to work on stuff that actually matters.
What is really sad though is that I could have come up with something so much better. So much for writers getting paid for what they do. I wouldn’t mind if they could actually surprise me now and then. You might then think that maybe they deserve what they get paid. Not in this case it would seem. Very prosaic. Very saccharin. Very ordinary. Very cheesy. Very unimaginative, they didn’t even try. Very disappointed, even for someone like me with such low expectations. You’ve got to wonder that even someone who is utterly so cynical is in the end witness to such breath-taking mediocrity and lack of creativity that they are actually amazed at how pathetic and weak the ideas are that are presented. I wasn’t expecting much. But this? I’m surprised Jesus wasn’t milling about in the end in the fucking church. There are thousands of people in the world who call themselves writers. But the fact is, very very few have any imagination. You are not a writer just because you can write “words”. No! you are not a writer. Next person I meet who tells me they are a writer I will laugh at them and mock them. Lost is over and will be forever forgotten for its shit and cheesy ending. I hope those “writers” get some integrity and quit their jobs and get decent honest and honorable employment picking up my trash. No offense meant to trash collectors by the way. At least trash collectors don’t try to pretend to be something they are not. I respect that.
Stephen Conroy is a censoring fucking bastard! Sorry if I wasn’t witty enough. He should be wearing one of those pointy Bishop’s hats. I reckon he does at night. The only people who agree with him are Christians and pedophiles and those two sets are definitely not mutually exclusive. Actually I wouldn’t be surprised if pedophiles are a strict subset of the set of Christians. i.e. P=pedophiles, C= Christians and $$ P \subseteq C $$
The TV show “Lost” is getting more and more lame. The first few episodes were interesting but it has finally devolved into a crypto-mystico-jesus-hippy fucking mess. I had hoped for something better. What is really sad is that I think the writers actually think they are being really clever. Either that or they are a bunch of cynical fucks who correctly realise that most of the audience will swallow this like a whore in a porno.
The call of nature is here again, that’s right it’s TurdHour® time. At 8:30pm March 27, have your bog roll ready for the biggest push in human history. An estimated 3 billion cyber entities across 5 million servers have already pledged their support for TurdHour® 2010 and with your support those numbers could double or even triple.
The TurdHour® group is a self interested organisation that aims is to appease the greater social conscience by providing fun and abstract ways of solving the world’s most challenging issues. For example TurdHour® is currently working with leading marketers to develop a unique ‘sports type’ drink to prevent whales from dehydrating while aboard scientific vessels in the southern oceans.
Astonishingly TurdHour® 2010 offers new and improved ways in which you can show your support:
1. Purchase your high-fibre TurdHourBurger® from affiliated restaurant chains, 24 to 48 hours before the night of March 27.
2. Defecate between the hour of 8:30pm and 9:30pm on March 27.
3. Purchase a brown TurdHourNosePeg® from the TurdHour® website.
4. Wear your brown TurdHourNosePeg® after you’ve defecated on March 27.
5. Head to your civic area (wearing your brown TurdHourNosePeg®) and join the TurdHour® sponsored fun.
6. Purchase a TurdHour® “I poo I vote” recovery T-shirt on March 28.
The TurdHour® 2010 festivities on March 27 include:
1. A world record attempt at the single longest broken chain of TurdHourNosePegs® across 94 cities around the world.
2. Live music from the activist, self promoting, rock band “U))p”
3. The honourable Federal Minister for Plastic Bags will discuss the benefits of faecal matter in insulating homes.
4. And a special launch from the Premier, for the new multi-billion dollar MyTurd® card. Which you will soon be able to swipe every time you enter a public toilet. A small donation will be removed from your account and sent straight to the TurdHour® fund.
Remember to pledge your commitment to poo on March 27, by pinning your arse to TurdHour® global supporters map and then you can rejoice in feeling good about the future!
If one wonders where the Universe came from and then supposes that it must have been created. Then that creator would surely be something beyond our understanding and we would call it God. Seems reasonable. But then one may ask about the origin of God. If God was created, then we are led to an infinite regress. So to avoid that let’s say God is eternal and has always existed. Problem solved, except what is to stop us saying the Universe itself has always existed in some form? Now, the age of the Universe as we know it, can be traced back to the Big Bang so it appears to have a definite creation date. But I am not suggesting that the Universe per-se is eternal, but whatever physical laws or mechanisms that gave rise to it are the things that are themselves eternal: No need for a God creator.
Why postulate another entity when it doesn’t really solve the problem but merely regresses it? So we are not compelled to posit the existence of a creator in this case, it seems.
1,858 cities, towns and municipalities in 81 countries and 260 million people have already committed to pooing on Saturday the 28th of March. Helping to create a methane stock pile for future generations and saving the planet at the same time.
How can you offset your CO2 skidmark? Simply do your poo between 830pm and 930pm on the night.
Remember your poo is your vote!
February 10th, 2009
Boris
Just set this up. Stay tuned for more action. Hopefully it will be more interesting than what I had for lunch.
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